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bomby
DanglyBrasco
Moozo
GearsCT
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Rebellious Backbencher
01casey
Black Suede
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Kaptain Kaviar
Dont Look Angry
Seany C
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 7:45 am

In my secondary school I didn't find any people that I'd fit in with although there were a few groups and only about 5 of what I'd label actual friends rather than acquaintances and I didn't have any friends to go out and play with in my area. This left as me quite a loner with underdeveloped social skills for my age and is also the reason why I flipped around from being a funny and chatty lad to an angry cunt on the forum so much.. McGugan can attest to how much of a quiet and socially clueless twat I was when I joined college, but thanks to a small student community of around 50 with a mostly decent bunch of friendly people I felt I'd gotten over most of my social anxieties and hangups by about halfway through the college year and I feel I am all the better for it. X360 was a big help in the old days though and for a long time I valued my friendships with the various knights I'd befriended better than any of those I had developed with people I'd actually met in person. Good luck with getting past that stage Suede. It's quite different for everyone but quite similar at the same time too but you'll get through it.
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Post by weeble Thu Jul 16, 2009 9:03 am

Im pretty much lost for words Suede, but i kinda know how you feel.
I was always considered the "weird" one at school and always have been....but from that i discovered the people who i now consider friends really are that.
I only stop in touch with 1 person from school...all my friends were made in my 20s...and that is when i became a happier person tbh.
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Post by Dont Look Angry Thu Jul 16, 2009 10:32 am

I know what you guys are saying. I would say I am good acquaintances with most of my year in school, can talk to nearly anyone about anything.

But when I comes to outside of school my social life turns to mush. Possibly go out with friends once month, this is due to where I live, about 45 minutes away from Belfast where most of my friends are, no buses go anywhere near me and taxi's are just too expensive so I have to rely on my parents who I don't want to burden with collecting me from Belfast at 2ish in the morning. So I have to make do sitting in 80% of weekends and do nothing bar some Gaelic and Rugby. Its kinda tough going in on Mondays and listening to everyone's stories from the clubs and bars the nights before and me having to sit there and go 'Well I just sat in'. It kind of affects you mentally from them to time with you start to over think it but I try and avoid it. I know its not on the same scale as others problems but hey is good to get it off my chest for once. Smile
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 10:50 am

I require a lift to the station to go out anywhere but it's only 10 minutes away. Although since I broke up from college recently I haven't been able to go out as much as I'd like due to budget restrictions, this led to a week of being nearly totally in the house. Luckily in my less social days I learnt how to enjoy and get by with just my own physical company, but without PSN and forums to browse it would of been a lot less manageable. Get paid before I go back though so my normal schedule will resume!
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Post by Rebellious Backbencher Thu Jul 16, 2009 12:29 pm

Well I'm devastated to hear about that Suede, really feel for you mate, which means that what I'm about to say may come across as a little heartless...
But I am glad to hear that this isn't a thought process exclusive to me. Not being alone in it gives weight to the suspicion I had back when I really didn't get out much that the majority of teenagers feel like this at some point.
I hope that for those who are still in a place they don't like much socially, it'll mean something to hear that I used to be there and moved away from it when I began to choose friends based on how well they fitted with my personality rather than what other people thought of them.
Much love.
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Post by Black Suede Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:11 pm

Yeah, I guess thanks guys. It's nice to know you're not the only miserable bugger in the world.

I like this quote from The Sopranos:

"Let me tell ya something. Nowadays, everybody's gotto go to shrinks, and counselors, and go on "Sally Jessy Raphael" and talk about their problems. What ever happened to Gary Cooper? The strong, silent type. That was an American. He wasn't in touch with his feelings. He just did what he had to do. See, what they didn't know was once they got Gary Cooper in touch with his feelings that they wouldn't be able to shut him up! And then it's dysfunction this, and disfunction that, and disfunction ma fangul!"


Last edited by Black Suede on Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:20 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:16 pm

Who says that and in what context? Don't think I've seen this episode.
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Post by Black Suede Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:23 pm

It's the pilot. When Tony is talking to Dr. Melfi for the first time.


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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:42 pm

Oh, SOPRANOS! Did I read that as The Simpsons in a moment of retardation or did you edit it? If not maybe this sun isn't good for me lol
Yeah, good quote. Fantastic series.
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:47 pm

Holy shit he looks so young there! And thin! The therapist whose name I never bothered to learn throughout the entire series looks just as old and ugly looking throughout the entire series though. rep +1 for that video.
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Post by 01casey Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:47 pm

Genuinely sorry to hear about all that Suede. The forums have provided a really good sense of escapism for me over the last few years too when things have been shit, which they frequently have. Around this time last year, I went through the toughest stage of my life since the age of around 9-12, and it just helped being able to go on X360 and just say stuff that I couldn't even share with my IRL friends. Now, things are alright, in a numb sort of way. I feel that last year events got to me so much with a couple of deaths surrounding me, not to mention a plethora of other issues, that I just don't sympathise or empathise very well in real life any more. Perhaps not caring is a good thing, seeing as I used to be a socially anxious nervous wreck (I still struggle in certain situations but I wouldn't class myself as socially anxious anymore). That's why I hate relationships too: I've seen enough fall apart around me in my childhood with my mum and dad and their partners, that I just see no good in them. And when I do get into them, I find myself struggling to commit to the other half.

I just feel I need something like that to focus on right now, though. Not specifically a relationship, but something to just keep me occupied. I considered starting a book, but I considered that 18 months ago too and got nowhere. Reviewing films helped for a while, but I've not stuck to it enough. I want to do something musically, but don't want to be in a band because I always think I'm the one with the right decisions, plus I'd shit myself on stage, AND I want to make something within the electronic genre, which I'm shit at. Not for an audience, but for me, completely.

And (I don't really like speaking about this but I will seeing as you've opened up), yeah, I've been in that state of mind a few times where it feels like everything in life is just a massive hurdle, and that there's really nothing to live for other than the bosom that is materialism that we suck as hard as hell to gain a little drip of happiness. But then I think about my friends, I think about the times that make me happy, I think about my wonderful (albeit disjointed) family who, despite some of the things I say, I love to bits. I think about the things that make me smile, the times in my life that bring a nostalgic sigh upon recollection. And that's when I realise that there is more to this life without believing in any god.

Didn't mean to blabber, but if you ever want to talk, I'm here. I know what you're going through is horrible, and I'm not trying to undermine it in any way when I say that I think I have a slight idea of how you feel, and it's not a nice place to be at all. Keep your chin up and live for those special moments.
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Post by Rebellious Backbencher Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:50 pm

01casey wrote:I want to do something musically, but don't want to be in a band because I always think I'm the one with the right decisions, plus I'd shit myself on stage, AND I want to make something within the electronic genre, which I'm shit at. Not for an audience, but for me, completely.

Dude. Funny raps. They're where it's at.
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Post by Kaptain Kaviar Thu Jul 16, 2009 1:51 pm

I think it's great that we all have a chance to reveal our inner demons here. I salute you all for being mature, intelligent and awesome people. Few forums can boast such a plethora of decent chaps.
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Post by 01casey Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:00 pm

I agree, we must be the closest community going!
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Post by Black Suede Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:20 pm

Seany C wrote:Oh, SOPRANOS! Did I read that as The Simpsons in a moment of retardation or did you edit it? If not maybe this sun isn't good for me lol
Yeah, good quote. Fantastic series.

Not Simpsons, but I just realised that I wrote it like Sopranos.

And yeah, it's incredible how thin he is there and how big he is in the final episode. Also, I get a little turned on in the scenes where he's having sex dreams about Dr. Melfi. Nice breasts, to be honest.

It is good that we can all talk like this. Who needs psychiatrists.
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Post by Dont Look Angry Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:23 pm

01casey wrote:I agree, we must be the closest community going!

To the showers!
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Post by GearsCT Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:34 pm

Dont Look Angry wrote:
01casey wrote:I agree, we must be the closest community going!

To the showers!

To the bedroom!

Wait, too quick?
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:40 pm

Not too quick, more a case of recycling the joke.

- rep for poor effort
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Post by GearsCT Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:42 pm

I feel you're trying to hunt for things to minus me on Sean scratch
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:44 pm

-rep for slander!


Nah, not really hun :-*
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Post by GearsCT Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:45 pm

Anyway... I'm off to play some drums
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:05 pm

Lol, who's going on a rep rampage?
It's either Gears because he cant face he got his hand slapped for swearing in the teahouse or weeble because he hates gamerscore and postcount and must naturally hate rep too.
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Post by GearsCT Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:13 pm

since I'm in the minus already I can't rep anyone now
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Post by Seany C Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:19 pm

Meh, I don't care. That's why this was on trial. It obviously has flaws as long as twats use the internet. I'll remove it at some point.
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Post by weeble Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:28 pm

Seany C wrote:Lol, who's going on a rep rampage?
It's either Gears because he cant face he got his hand slapped for swearing in the teahouse or weeble because he hates gamerscore and postcount and must naturally hate rep too.

The whowhats????

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